Beauty and the Geek is back!

I have mixed feelings about this season of Beauty and the Geek, with the various changes to its format. But I'm crossing my fingers!

So in case you didn't watch last season, I'll refer you to my posts about it. I was very unhappy with how most of the season went, because I felt like the point of the show was being lost (see my post here) - but the producers redeemed themselves in the end (see my post here).

This season, though, they started things off right. (Yay Ashton Kutcher!) First of all, they've added in a lot more explanation by the host about the point of the show. They've also added in IQ tests for the beauties and social IQ tests for the geeks at the beginning of the show, which are designed to determine the starting point for each contestant - putting the focus back on personal growth for each individual.

After the tests (and a night with everyone sleeping outside), the lowest-scoring beauty and the lowest-scoring geek were announced. Those two were then charged with interviewing each contestant and then choosing all nine pairings. This is different than the format in previous years, where the partners were chosen at first meeting, solely on face value, usually with the more obnoxious and assertive people getting to make first selection. I always thought that process was bogus, so tonight I was pleased with the change. This exercise made people think a lot harder about who they wanted to be paired with and why, and it helped them get to know each other instead of judging a book by its cover. It also worked out better that the lowest-scoring contestants got to pick each team - they really put a lot of thought in to the decision, and although some of it was strategy, it was more about who they thought could learn the most from each other. All of this aligned much better with the point of the show, which made me very happy.

The part I'm uneasy about is the surprise twist at the end. The host announced that they'd be adding a 10th team to the mix - a "geek" who's a girl, and a "beauty" who's a guy. Don't get me wrong, I saw this reversed format coming from a mile away. But I worry about implementing only ONE team like this, instead of having a whole separate version of the show with all teams' genders reversed. Although, like the host said, this show has always been about the social experiment. And this is a social experiment indeed. So, we'll see how it goes. Maybe it will end up teaching everyone a lot -- that's it's not what they can learn from female beauties or male geeks, but it's what they can learn from other people who aren't like them, regardless of gender. I'm worried that it will create more stereotypes, but hopefully it will go one step further in breaking them down.

Rock Your Soul

Sorry to double up posts, but this one applies to both of my blogs. Just a couple of my favs from SYTYCD... they're very short. And amazing. The first is Shane Ryan's hip-hop. The second is Mia Michaels' contemporary (and SMOKING HOT... seriously it's like really really sexy...). It's done to a song by Elisa. Also, if you like Elisa (she's amazing), you can also listen to my favorite Elisa song below the videos. It's called "Rock Your Soul."


("Tambourine" by Eve)


("Dancing" by Elisa)

Davis the Disser

I'm not sure how many of you are still watching Real World. I'm a bit of a late joiner -- this is the first season I've watched. I can't get enough of it, and I'm hoping MTV starts playing Real World marathons so I can see the older seasons. This week on Real World Denver, though, Davis verbally bitch-slapped all the girls in the house with his comments on their looks. I was kind of taken aback... we've seen Davis get pretty cruel in past episodes (thus insane Brooke throwing water all over him a few weeks ago), but this week he took catty to a new level.

First you have to know that there's been weirdness going on between Davis and Brooke. Davis is the token gay character, and he sleeps with Brooke. Figure that one out. Supposedly it's just sleeping, but homeboy fights with Brooke like they're dating, and Brooke has been getting confused. Shocker.

This week, Davis was out with Jen, and he inexplicably offered up criticism of how the three girls in the house look. He said that in his high school, Colie would not be considered pretty and that he thinks she's actually kind of a dog, despite her nice rack. He said that he doesn't think Brooke is pretty, honestly, and that when she looks down she has a double-chin, so she should always look up. (Really, Davis? Really?!) Then when pressed, he told Jen that she has nice skin and nice breasts but that she could stand to lose some weight. Ouch. I'm sure you're shocked that Jen went home and told the girls what Davis said (although she wouldn't reveal specifics except about the double chin).

If you've watched any episodes of Real World Denver, you know that Brooke doesn't take this kind of thing lightly. And by that, I mean she usually has some kind of intense psychotic episode of epic proportions. This week was no exception. After attempting to confront Davis at a bar (all business transactions on Real World take place in a bar), Brooke stormed home, locked herself in the bathroom, and started screaming at the top of her lungs. Then she ran into Davis' room and trashed it, breaking lamps and throwing bed dressings on the floor. Then she left some creative notes on his bed telling him to rot in hell. Classic.

You just have to admit, this is great TV. Brooke's breakdowns are irresistable, and Davis' insincere apologies just ASK for more drama. In fact, the preview for next week shows Davis spilling his guts about the Alex/Jen/Colie love triangle that everyone forgot about in the midst of Brooke's outright insanity, Tyrie's angry black man antics and Steven's reticence about being an Outward Bound slacker. Tune in at 10pm on Wednesday to see the inevitably fantastic tears-filled results.

Goodbye-a Sanjaya

One word. "Ponyhawk."

You've gotta give it to this Sanjaya kid -- he's got quite the clever strategy. Besides having the backing of the anti- American Idol web wonder "votefortheworst.com" and Howard Stern (the chauvenistic shock jock, not the one claiming to be Anna Nicole's baby's dad), he has the most varied collection of hair-don'ts in the history of the show. He teases it, or he uses a flat iron, and the judges, who can't think of anything good to say about his singing, comment on his hair every week. This week though... wow. In honor of guest judge Gwen Stefani (who, by the way, makes a much better performer than vocal coach... yikes), Sanjaya styled his hair in a fake mohawk (Paula called it a faux-hawk) made up of seven tiny ponytails. Oh, Sanjaya.

He's a terrible performer -- he's just GOT to go. But this week, his combination teeny bopper girl/ anti-establishment adult male fan base, his bright white teeth, and his mysterious ponyhawk spared him from the bottom three. Safe yet again. Looks like smug Sanjaya's got nine lives. And I fear it's just gonna get worse. This week Chris Sligh went home. Understandable, considering his slow unraveling the last few weeks. (But the guy's actually talented! No, seriously. If you don't remember from earlier in the season that he's actually pretty good, check out his band's video on You Tube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Ps3b_FTTCo) But we all know Sanjaya should have gone a long time ago. Hopefully soon the buzz will die down and so will Sanjaya's laughable popularity. I guess he makes for good TV. But still. America. I beg of you. Stop voting for Sanjaya. Because if Jordin or Mindy Doo or Blake or "Kiki" get kicked off in lieu of Sanjaya the Hairtastic, I'm calling you all up and convincing you individually that you're doing the world a disservice. And believe me, you don't want that.

Underdog?: the difference between Max and Sanjaya

I've already admitted that I watch (and now love) the Grease show. I can't help it -- I'm seriously addicted. But now I have an even bigger secret. I've become an American Idol-watcher.

Before this season, I had only seen a handful of episodes. The season Clay Aiken charmed those of us who love a good closet case, I watched the last couple weeks. I also watched the last couple weeks during the season with Bo Bice and Constantine. (Who won that year? Carrie Underwood?) Anyway, that's it. I just never got into it... I think because I always had class or rehearsals when it was on (and DIDN'T have the wonder of DVR like I do now). Also, I can't stand the audition episodes, so I usually never make it past them. Regardless, I've gotten hooked this season (thanks to the DVR gods above. Watch Idol without DVR at your own peril). I'm not going to bore you with a run-down of my opinions on each contestant, although opinions I do have. Instead, I'd just like to briefly opine on what it means to be an underdog and who the real underdogs are in the world of reality TV. (Well, okay, just the Grease show and American Idol. Ashamedly, I do watch hordes of other reality TV shows, but we won't get into those now. Except to say that Sisely is the underdog on the Pussycat Dolls show, not Chelsea or Mariela. Read further to find out why.)

We'll start with the Grease show, because it offers the epitome of an underdog story: Max. How much do you love Max?! Max is a true underdog, and here's why... he's super talented!! He came into the competition looking like some kid you vaguely remember from high school, and his nickname on the show is "Slacker Danny." Unlike Austin and Jason, Max hasn't been on (or off) Broadway. Unlike Chad or Derek, he doesn't have the classic Danny look. Unlike Kevin, he's not too shy to be on Broadway, and unlike Matt, he doesn't suck. He's cute in a best-friend-who-makes-you-laugh kind of way, and in my opinion, he's the best singer in the competition. He's been criticized by the judges for not looking like Danny, for being too twerpy, for having big ears, etc etc... but they greased his hair and had him lift weights, and now he really looks like he could lead a gang (and look pretty darn cute doing it). What makes him the underdog isn't that he's BAD, and it's not that he's UGLY. Cuz he's not! And it's also not that he had bell's palsy as a kid (although... wow). No, he's an underdog because he's GOOD. Good but unlikely. He faced seemingly insurmountable odds (come on, admit it, at the beginning you liked Max but never thought he'd make it to the finals), and he does well every week DESPITE those odds. He's a fighter, he has natural talent, and now he made it into the finals. Because who doesn't love an underdog story? (PS I usually vote for Max online every week. I'll admit that this week I actually also voted via phone. Sad, I know.)

So in light of Max's story, who's the underdog of American Idol? Or, let's start here... who ISN'T the underdog of American Idol? SANJAYA. Why? Because he's AWFUL. He's worse than bad. He's HIDEOUS. He can style his hair like Paula all he wants... it doesn't make him any better. Unlike Max, Sanjaya sucks. I'm not just being mean here people, he's BAD. Like Simon said this week, the shots of the girl sobbing all through his performance explains it all. America, you're the ones who should be crying right now. Because instead of eliminating Sanjaya (who should have been eliminated the very first week, nevermind making it into the top 10), you eliminated Stephanie. And Sanjaya wasn't even in the bottom two!! Really? Steph and Chris in the bottom two?! America, you've got to understand that he is NOT the underdog of this competition. He's the joke. Every week they tell him his smile's pretty... because there's nothing they can say about his singing, since it's so bad that it's beyond help. He's almost like William Hung (ok, not THAT bad, but still!), except this time he made it in, unlike Hung, who got famous from his audition. But I don't think anyone thought Hung was the underdog. He was the joke. And the same goes for Sanjaya. So please stop voting for him. It's not funny anymore. And if you're voting for him because you think he's the underdog, think again.

The real underdog of this competition, if you ask me, is Jordin Sparks. Here's why. I remember her from auditions, and I liked her back then. She made it to Hollywood, and she's been giving solid performances every week. She's a very talented singer, and I love listening to and watching her perform. But since they got to Hollywood, she's been living in the shadow of LaKisha and Melinda (who are also both very talented). But that's why Jordin's the underdog. No, she doesn't have LaKisha's "big black woman" sound/look, and she doesn't have Melinda's charming but slightly irritating humility. As far as I know, she also doesn't have a kid at home. The first couple weeks she kind of got lost in the shuffle with all the hullabaloo surrounding La to the K and Mindy-Doo. But as everything gets sifted out, and the posers get separated from the raw talent, Jordin's been getting noticed by the judges. This week, I think I remember one of the judges calling her the Kelly Clarkson of the competition. (I might have taken that as an offense a while ago, but I like KC these days, and she did WIN Idol after all.) What makes Jordin the underdog is exactly what makes Sanjaya anything but -- TALENT. She's damn good. And unlikely, because the odds are severely in favor of the other two women. Well, or Blake. He's really cool too. But definitely not an underdog.

So do you see the difference, America?! If you want to vote for an underdog, Jordin Sparks is the way to go. She's the Max of American Idol. And if you're just voting for Sanjaya because his hair is prettier than yours, or because you feel bad for him since he thinks he can hula but really can't do that either, remember what Simon always says... this is a SINGING competition.

Redemption

I just briefly wanted to say that I retract my criticism of Ashton Kutcher and the other producers of Beauty and the Geek. They DID come through in the end, and now the world is right again. So clearly they read my blog. ;-) Just kidding.

But seriously, they changed the format of the final elimination to REALLY measure the contestants' transformations. Instead of asking them lame questions about each other to determine which team wins (like they did in the other seasons), the producers surprised the contestants by bringing back all of their fellow competitors to VOTE to determine which team made the greatest transformation. Needless to say, evil CeCe got hers this week. And she deserved every one of those people telling her she's evil, because she is. In her final interview, she said: "Any of those girls who think they could learn something from some geeky guy... well they're as stupid as they look." Gee CeCe, that's one of your greatest hits, along with "These guys are big loser nerds," and "I only came here for the money."

So thank you, producers, for recognizing and subsequently rectifying the problem -- and for dissuading these types of competitors from tainting the show in the future. And yay for the brunettes for getting a chance to do unto CeCe as she did unto them.

You're the one that I want!

Anyone who has suffered through participation in any kind of show choir (or perhaps suffered through watching a show choir performance) is all too familiar with the hand jive, Grease Lightning and probably a poodle skirt or two. I'm not sure I realized how utterly annoying Grease can be until I watched "Grease!: You're the one that I want" on NBC tonight. But regardless of its high cheese factor and boppy '50s-style music, Grease holds a special place in my heart. (Maybe it was the Grease sleepover at Karli's in 7th grade, or maybe the Grease music videos we used to make... but I won't deny that I know every word and lyric to that movie.) That's why I've been wary of letting America decide who gets to star in the new revival of one of the most popular musicals on Broadway. We see what a stellar job America has done picking winners on American Idol... sigh.

I've gotta say though, my being wary of America tainting Broadway has suddenly taken a back seat to my beef with the format and style of this show itself. This is the first week I've watched NBC's latest reality-tv debacle, and I was quite taken aback. I suppose form must follow function, and Grease is the cheesiest of the cheese. ("Tell me about it... STUD!") But all I can say about NBC's show is... yikes.

I shouldn't rag on it too much... it's a great show to watch while you work out, and it's very entertaining. So in that respect -- well done, NBC. I also have to admit up front that I have a slight bias because one of the final 6 guys (Kevin) is from Tiff's high school in Greece, NY. (Yeah. Greece. Grease. Get it?) Because Tiff knows him, I feel like I know him, and I'm very excited that he's in the final 6. Way to go, upstate NY! Plus, he's a real cutie! And very talented. Okay, but all that aside, here are my issues with this show...

First of all, these people are being cast in a Broadway show. Why aren't we seeing any acting? I understand that's the philosophy behind having to hear them all sing random pop songs instead of the music from the show... supposedly they're showing us the different sides of their characters. I also understand that Olivia Newton-John was a pop singer and NOT an actress before she got cast in the movie. (Ahem... and after she got cast too.) But I'm really hoping that in order to make it to the finals they had to prove they can act, because otherwise Broadway's in trouble.

Secondly, the overly laudatory, cheery attitude of the judges is really getting to be too much. Having Olivia Newton-John as the guest judge this week was bad enough. (P.S. can anyone say plastic surgery? Holy crap. She looks like a barbie doll of herself.) But the judges are falling all over these contestants. I never thought I'd say this, but they need a Simon Cowell. The producer of Grease, who sits on the judging panel, is trying to be like Simon... but isn't even close. I mean, okay, most of these people are pretty good. But what is the point of doing this every week if they're all going to say "Great job! You're beautiful! Any of you could be the next Sandy!" And don't even get me started on the flirting that's going on between the male host and all the male contestants. Not that I have a problem with it. This is something else I never thought I'd ever say, but I actually prefer Ryan Seacrest's bisexual flirting. He flirts with the guys and the girls, no discrimination. It's actually nice and kind of refreshing to see these kind of homoerotic overtones on this kind of show... but damn. The girls are really pretty too! The playful flirting with only the guys is getting to be a bit much, man. Share the wealth!

Thirdly, speaking of the host... what is up with the nicknames he gives to each contestant? If that's supposed to be some kind of gimmick (I really don't see the point, but okay), it's pretty lame. I mean, "the sensitive Sandy!" "the spiritual Sandy!" "the ballerina Sandy!" ... Seriously?! And then there's always the host's affectionate slap-in-the-face remark to a contestant named Matt: "I was going to call you 'the man-tears Danny,'" (the contestant looks genuinely hurt... almost like he might cry. haha.) "but I thought that was probably inappropriate." Yeah, no kidding, Sherlock. I just don't understand why they're trying to add gimmicks like that. Seriously, the music of Grease is cheesy enough. Not that we're actually hearing much Grease music, since the contestants are singing pop songs. But still.

Anyway, all that aside, here's my biggest problem with this show at the moment...

WHY ON EARTH did they bring back those two contestants who lost and never made it past Grease camp?!?!?!

It's just embarrassing for them. They're both terrible, and the producer judge actually TOLD them they're terrible (thank the lord) -- which was extra embarrassing, since he and the other judges were practically licking all of the other contestants' faces.

Both of these "second chance" people are awkward on stage, and their songs were horrendous. They were singing wrong notes, they were flat, and sharp, and... yikes. I literally hid my face in my hands while they were singing. I couldn't bear to watch. What is the producer thinking?!

I'm the first to admit that I love an underdog story. But the real underdog of this competition is Max... the guy with the big ears who "doesn't look like a Danny Zucko" and is affectionately nicknamed "the slacker Danny." That guy's outstanding, he doesn't try too hard, and he's definitely the underdog of this competition, since he doesn't have the usual "look."

Don't bring back two people who clearly shouldn't be on Broadway, just because you think "America might vote for them." This producer guy has been refreshingly blunt about how he's just trying to make more money on his show (unlike Simon Cowell, who IS just trying to make more money but pretends that's not his motivation)... so why the hell did he bring back two trainwrecks?! I don't understand it.

Anyway, if you want to see some attractive people who look vaguely like John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John (pre-plastic surgery) -- including a hottie from Rochester -- singing their little hearts out on the cheesiest show in the world, tune in to "Grease!: You're the one that I want." But don't call and order advance tickets just yet.

Social experiment gone bad

Okay, I'd just like to say... I was on board.

The last two seasons, I was the big, overly vocal champion for "Beauty and the Geek."

I overlooked that it was Ashton Kutcher's show. The guy's not so bad. I overlooked the name of the show. I mean, after all, they SAID it's a social experiment. They only used those words in the title because although the contestants might come in holding those stereotypes, the point is to figure out that they're just stereotypes. (Classic announcer voice: "Can they become more than just the beauty and the geek??") I even overlooked the fact that they give the guys makeovers during the season. First of all, I've gotta admit that I love seeing makeovers. But more importantly, they had to give the guys some confidence, right? (Eh, okay, I'm still a little shaky with that one.)

But the point is... I was on board.

Then this season reared its ugly head. No pun intended. When I watch this season, I have knots in my stomach and trouble breathing. And no, it's not because I think the guys are hot, although a few of them are actually lookers. No. It's because I'm literally having anxiety attacks FOR the brunette girls in the group.

You might be saying... "What? What did she say?? Brunette girls??!! What does she mean by that?"

I mean brunette girls. Because this season, the blondes (ahem, bottle blondes, if I do say so myself, but I don't want to get as catty as everyone else...) have teamed up against THE BRUNETTE GIRLS. This is not a joke. And as of tonight, the brunettes have been effectively ELIMINATED from the competition. Yep. Voted out. I am having flashbacks to high school when all the "cool" kids (I'm throwing up in my mouth as I even say those words) used to treat me exactly how the blondes on this show are treating the brunettes. And now not only have the brunettes been relegated to the loser table in the cafeteria and faced with catty taunting... they've actually been eliminated.

The blonde girls have decided that the brunettes aren't as cool as they are. (This is not just pent-up high school hostility talking. Tonight one of the more vile of the blonde bunch said to Andrea, one of the brunettes, that Andrea shouldn't sit around playing chess like a nerd. Yeah. Even though Andrea's partner was TEACHING her chess, and the point of the show is to learn from your partner. But the blondes don't care about that... they literally sunbathe by the pool every day. And Vile Blonde Girl even said to Andrea "Sorry I'm cooler than you." Hello? Come on, people!!! What happened to the point of this show?! It's gone! You've completely MISSED it. Ahh!)

I'm very upset about this season. I started out pretty wary when I found out in the first episode that some of the (blonde) girls were Playboy models and WWF ring girls... what happened to using regular people?

But this is beyond bad. In the past two seasons, there were usually one or two contestants who clearly only cared about winning the money and getting the hell out and didn't give a damn about Ashton's "social experiment" or breaking stereotypes, etc. There was only one from each season that I remember. Clearly this season there are ZERO girls left who care about learning anything from the experience. It's very upsetting.

I guess I'm ranting now, but I do not need to watch high school on TV. I've had confrontations before exactly like Andrea and vile girl had tonight. It's not pleasant. And vile girls like that are just plain mean. They're terrible to the guys, and they're even meaner to the other girls. And I just can't stand it. This is not high school gym class. Get over it. Participate in the spirit of this show or get out. I just feel like the producers should DO something about this. They can't have another season of this show if this is how everyone's going to play. Not only is it defeating the purpose, but it's giving TV time and prize money to cruelty. I'm OVER it.

And on a final note, please don't be like this to other people. If you're someone who acts like these girls act, you make the rest of us feel pretty crappy. And please don't try out for a TV show that's supposed to be a social experiment where you're supposed to learn that there's more to everyone than you thought before. Cuz clearly you don't care. It's never okay to make someone feel like a piece of crap just because you think you're cooler or more attractive than they are.

Okay, I'm done. And I'm officially OFF board.